Where I Should Stay

I watch them fast asleep aftr a pillow fight. My son, so oblivious to the storm I've been trying so hard to pacify for him. My husband, bearing my indignation I've been pathetically trying to hold on to. As long as I resent him for his infidelity, I feel I am justified for staying in love with another man. The longer I stay watching him sleep, the more I feel so powerless. I used to love him so so so much my world revolved around him. All I ever wanted was to make him happy,grow old with him,make dreams come true with him. I want so much to be in his arms again. I miss those glances that made me feel so protected,so safe. I miss the blissful revolution in my heart whenever we kissed. I miss becoming so weak, from his touches. I miss my stomach quivering whenever we held hands... I have to trust him again if I ever want to come back home to his heart. Again. Such a tall order to impose upon myself. But this the life we started building together, this where our love brought us...this is where i should stay.